self-portrait as a young woman

self-portrait as a young woman 2016, acrylic, Mylar, 24x36

In Moscow in the late 70's there were no styling products; heir grew organically. So did I. Cloths in the woman's sections were made of woven cotton and wool. This fabric wasn't flexible and the cuts were tailored to fit the woman's body. My body was a poor fit for the cut. Wide-shouldered and flat-breasted, I was doomed to wear boy's shirts, sweaters and pants. They, too, were ugly, but I was used to wearing them from my childhood as the hand me downs from my older brother. Along with the cloths, my brother provided me with friends; girls didn't want to play with those who were dressed like boys. When my brother and his friends turned thirteen their interests changed, and I found myself alone. The world was small; the only new friends I found were a woman 48 years older than me  with an unusual for our neighborhood fate, and a dog. This company taught me many thing but not to fit in.

I am a painter, an artist, a loner, but I am growing my hair. I don't know yet how long I will go. The goal is to fit in. Not as a woman, who wears close-fitted spandex cloths, but as an artist, who cannot find a venue to make her art known.